Parliamo Scots?
- Windows Recall

Here is a piece which has been doing the rounds of the Scottish newsgroups. It illustrates some of the finer points of the Scots language...

Windows Recall

It has come to our attention that a few copies of the Scotland version of Windows 98 may have accidentally been shipped outside Scotland.

If you have one of the Scotland editions you may need some help understanding the commands. The Scotland edition may be recognized by looking at the opening screen. It reads WINDAES 98, Ye Ken, with a background picture of William Wallace superimposed on a St. Andrews Cross. It is shipped with a Mel Gibson screen saver.

Also note the Recycle Bin is called 'The Bucket.'
My Computer is called 'Thon Computer Thingie.'
Dialup Networking is called 'Phone the Bhoys.'
Control Panel is known as 'the Dashboard.'
Hard Drive is referred to as 'the tractor.'
Floppies are referred to as 'thae wee plastic disc things.'

Other features:
- Instead of an error message you get a windae covered with a picture of a neep.
- OK = 'ats fine'
- cancel = na na ma loon
- reset = Och ye'd be as weel startin again
- yes = Och aye
- no = nae chunce mon
- find = if ye'd bothered to pit it past in a safe place, ye widnae need to look for it noo
- go to = go'n ower 'ere
- back = back the wye
- help = geese a haun'
- stop = pack it in
- start = com on 'en
- settings = sittins
- programs = stuff whit daes stuff
- documents = stuff I hive done afore

Also note that Windaes 98 does not recognise capital letters or punctuation marks.

Some programs that are exclusive to Windaes 98:
- Pincil an paper...........A word processor
- Colourin book.......a Graphics program
- Addin machine......calculator
- Andrex......notepad
- Jukebox............CD player
- Photies.............A graphics viewer
- Tax records.........usually an empty file

We regret any inconvenience it may have caused if you received a copy of the Scotland edition. You may return it to Microsoft for a replacement version.

Return to the Index of Parliamo Scots?

Where else would you like to go in Scotland?

Separator line